Live… And Still Kicking! Bonnie Langford – The Pheasantry

Live… And Still Kicking! Bonnie Langford at The Pheasantry, London.

Star rating: five stars ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Is there anything that lovable, high-kicking, eternally youthful Bonnie Langford cannot do? For over half a century we’ve seen this incredibly versatile entertainer do pretty well everything in the worlds of musical theatre and television but what’s far less well-known is that she’s a fabulous cabaret performer with a great gift as a storyteller.

For two action-packed, life-enhancing hours at fabled Chelsea nightspot The Pheasantry she took a packed audience on her showbiz journey from almost unbearably cute six-year-old winning the TV talent show Opportunity Knocks right up to present-day stage successes, most recently as Evangeline Harcourt in the second coming of Anything Goes at the Barbican.

Bravely she told the Noel Coward story from her West End stage debut against herself that has gone into theatre folklore. She was seven playing Bonnie Butler in a musical version of Gone With the Wind. Her pony Charlie chose press night to have a poo on stage, by no means the only disaster of the evening. Asked by the producer at the after-show party how he might improve the production, Coward remarked cattily “Solve two problems at once… shove the child up the horse’s arse”, adding the kindly thought “Cut the second act and the child’s throat”. Langford said she was “privileged” to be numbered among the many people The Master had insulted.

Amusing though they were (to some), Coward’s headline-grabbing words might have destroyed many a child actor’s confidence. Not our feisty little redhead who bounced right back to enjoy rave reviews a year or so later as Baby June in Gypsy on both sides of the Atlantic when “everything was coming up roses”, at least until there was a bit of monkey business!

With her mother over in New York as chaperone, she shared a dressing room with a tame little monkey called Edith Ann who was fed with baby food and was part of the show. The beast nipped her playfully one day and her mother, in a panic fearing she might get Rabies, rushed her off to A&E and got told to “get in line” behind the assorted drunks and walking wounded that New Year’s Eve. The poor child lived to tell the tale… and many others in a fascinating trip down memory lane.

After that there was no stopping her… Annie of course, and when she was a “veteran” of 15 along came Cats and creating the part of cat-burglar Rumpleteazer in the original production when Judi Dench had to cry off late with an injury and Elaine Paige was drafted in at short notice to sing ‘Memory’.

Then as an adult, so much more fame through Sweet Charity, Charlie Girl, Roxie Hart in Chicago – cue ‘All That Jazz’ – Miss Adelaide in Guys and Dolls, ingenue Peggy Sawyer and fading star Dorothy Brock in 42nd Street – she claims to have been the only actress to play both female leads – Peter Pan The Musical, The Pirates Of Penzance and so much more, not least tribute concerts to Stephen Sondheim, for his 75th and 85th birthdays at the Theatre Royal, Drury Lane and this May the all-star Old Friends gathering to celebrate his life at the Sondheim Theatre.

Choosing two of Sondheim’s wittiest ditties at The Pheasantry, the oh-so-naughty ‘Can That Boy Foxtrot!’ (written for but not used in Follies) and the tongue-twisting spoof on ‘The Girl From Ipanema’ he wrote with Mary Rodgers for an Off-Broadway revue, Langford carried off both tricky numbers with tremendous verve.

Then there was all the TV stuff, The Hot Shoe Show series with Wayne Sleep, Dr Who, banging her head in Dancing on Ice, reaching the final of The Masked Dancer as Squirrel, award-winning acting as Carmel Kazemi in EastEnders… she’s not been short of work, has she?

And panto. She’s a great supporter. Did her first at 14, Peter Pan at Wimbledon, believes it’s a great way to introduce children to the theatre. Oh yes, there’s been the odd movie too. Remember Bugsy Malone? Yes, she was in that!

There was more spoofing, this time of herself, when she good-humouredly took Wikipedia to task for inaccuracies on her CV but before that a hark back to the 1960s and three queens of song, Dusty Springfield, Petula Clark (still working at 90 in Mary Poppins) and Cilla Black, remembered with ‘You Don’t Have to Say You Love Me’, ‘Downtown’ and ‘Step Inside Love’.

And in a sparkly catsuit, black for the first set, red for the second, she dazzled, her legs kicking as high as ever and doing the splits as effortlessly as ever. Fair enough, the voice might not be memorable but it’s the way she puts them over. She’s a great trouper – and Anthony England gives sublime support on the piano.

Her philosophy might best be summed up by the number she opened the second half with, ‘Use What You Got’. This lady uses everything and gives everything.

Ever upbeat, she finishes with ‘The Best is Yet to Come’ – “the advice I would give my seven-year-old self” – and the Anthony Newley/Leslie Bricusse classic ‘Feeling Good’ which is the way she left her totally satisfied fans. In my case, totally exhausted too by her sheer vivacity and staying power. Whatever she’s having, can I have some?

Jeremy Chapman