We Will Rock You – London Coliseum

Elena Skye in We Will Rock You at the London Coliseum. Picture: Manuel Harlan

We Will Rock You continues at the London Coliseum until 27 August 2023.

Star rating: three stars ★ ★ ★ ✩ ✩

Queen wrote some excellent songs, and it will always be exhilarating to see that catalogue performed live by great musicians. With tickets starting at £25, We Will Rock You is a fine idea for a fun night out. For all the critics sniping at this play over the years, it is an undeniable crowd-pleaser.

So, let’s start with all the good stuff. For a rock musical, a good band is essential, and musical director Stuart Morley’s six-piece are outstanding. They capture the magic of those intricately engineered studio recordings while adding just a touch of the freewheeling rock ‘n’ roll swagger essential for any live gig. The Coliseum’s sound system is cranked much louder than I have ever heard it, and when the show is in full rock concert mode with the audience singing and clapping along, there is absolutely a kind of magic in the air.

Freddie Mercury possessed one of the most extraordinary singing voices the world has ever heard, which surely makes casting actors for this show challenging. Fortunately, the performers are – without exception – fully committed and in possession of outstanding talent. From the huge ensemble to Brenda Edwards’ camply villainous Killer Queen, to Lee Mead’s creepily authoritarian Khashoggi, to the Adrian Hansel and Christine Allado Brit and Meat double act of high horniness and even higher belting, every talented singer in this cast gives their all to this occasionally silly show and does justice to the classic tunes they are performing.

It’s a little inevitable given that they are the main protagonists and given some of the best songs, but Ian McIntosh and Elena Skye as Galileo and Scaramouche shocked me again and again with the sheer virtuosity of their vocals. A minute after being floored by a McIntosh soaring high note, I would be melted into my seat by Skye’s extraordinary alto depth and tone. And vice versa. The London Coliseum is a big space, but the voices of these incredible young stars fill every corner. They also gamely threw themselves into the campy drama of the plot and seemed to be one-upping each other to find new and interesting ways to tell the show’s one joke (“Remember this lyric/person/thing? We don’t”).

If you’re not familiar with the plot of We Will Rock You, you are one of the lucky ones. A show with such talented performances and incredible songs does not really need a narrative device to entertain, but I suppose musicals sell more tickets than tribute bands or something so we’re stuck with it. Comedian and novelist Ben Elton’s story is set in a dystopian future where “real music” – i.e. music that’s better than the nonsense kids today listen to, that stuff’s just noise, not like the proper stuff back in my day – is banned by the evil Killer Queen. A group of Bohemians must track down the last guitar on Earth to somehow defeat her. Which they… do, I suppose? The wafer-thin plot very much fizzles out as the show turns into a fully-fledged rock concert at the end, but to be honest, this is the most purely thrilling part of the evening and what everyone came to see.

There are some decent laughs to be had – especially in Act I before The Joke gets driven into the ground through repetition – and the campy self-awareness of the script goes a long way to make it all more palatable. We Will Rock You would have been a thousand times worse with a pretentious, ‘worthy’ script full of desperate heartstring tugs and commentary on the human condition, so we can at least thank Elton for avoiding that.

The only major disappointment comes from it all feeling a little unambitious. Sure, it’s big – the songs are huge, the video screens are huge, the performances are huge, but so is Queen – that’s to be expected. We Will Rock You doesn’t so much add to or illuminate the genius of their music as much as it casually reminds you that it exists. Those huge video screens are largely used as an expensive alternative to real sets, playing oddly low-resolution images and videos which flatten the playing space and – criminally – hide the brilliant band. Theatre – and especially musical theatre – are such powerful and varied art forms, but so many elements of We Will Rock You feel like a wasted opportunity. Exciting and interesting are sacrificed for not wanting to get in the way of the Queen songs that are focus group-proven to work.

Elton’s onstage presence as the Rebel Leader is a bit incongruous with the technical vocal virtuosity on display elsewhere, but his comedically curmudgeonly presence does bring some variety. As he takes his bow at the end, the standing audience applaud with appreciation for his work. This is an entertaining show that he and Queen have crafted; a fun night out; a pleasant, campy showcase for some incredible music. The performances sometimes even elevate it to spectacular. If you enjoy Queen’s music and you go to shows to have fun rather than to fastidiously analyse shows in the context of the theatrical canon, you are 99% guaranteed to have a good time. Maybe get a glass of wine* at the Coliseum bar to guarantee that other 1% too.

* just one – you want to enjoy yourself, not annoy other patrons! I guarantee you, your rendition of ‘Somebody to Love’ will not rival Elena Skye’s.

Ian Bowkett