Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe – Stream.Theatre

David Ribi in Eurobeat – The Pride of Europe. Picture: Darren Bell

Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe is streaming via Stream.Theatre until 10 May 2021.

Star rating: four stars ★ ★ ★ ★ ✩

It’s May, which can only mean one thing: the Eurovision Song Contest will be on our screens soon! And what better way to get in the mood than watching the latest iteration of Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe, a highly enjoyable pastiche of everyone’s favourite music competition.

I first saw Eurobeat over ten years ago, and although the songs and location have changed, the central premise of gently poking fun at our European neighbours (and ourselves) in the format of a song contest remains firmly intact.

The setting, in a wonderfully improbable turn of events, is Liechtenstein (who have never actually been in the real contest). Cue some deliberately dodgy accents and lots of jokes about a small microstate, which, apparently, is the world’s largest supplier of false teeth. Who knew?

Keeping the evening on track is “international glamour icon and two times cow-milking champion” Marlene Cabana, played with relish and fine voice by David O’Reilly’s Orla Board. After a suitably uplifting opening number, ‘The World is My Dancefloor’, and an explanation of the rules by ‘Boring’ Sven Svensson, it’s time to listen to songs from “nine European nations… and the United Kingdom”.

Music and lyrics are by Craig Christie, who mercilessly lampoons a range of Eurovision genres, from banger pop to gentle, low key ballad. There’s much fun to be had in recognising the inspiration behind each of the ten entries. The Swedish and Ukrainian contributions, for example, clearly tip their hats to ‘Euphoria’ and ‘Wild Dances’, the winning songs from 2012 and 2004. There are also some lovely touches for the hardcore fans out there: I particularly enjoyed the catchy Lithuanian entry from the deliberately expressionless duo, Idomus, whose minimalist, arty dance moves are reminiscent of the choreography used by The Roop, this year’s real (and excellent) Lithuanian entry.

Obviously the show plays heavily on European nation stereotypes, so we get ‘Tick Tock’ from “that chocolate fondue of a country” famous for cuckoo clocks, Switzerland; Ireland’s Seamus O’Leary with a Riverdance spoof; and Romania’s Earnestina delivering a crazy Dracula vibe with a song that makes much of the nonsensical lyrics often heard at the contest.

And then there’s the wonderfully epic Norwegian entry, ‘The Vikings’, from Hammer of Thor ft Brunhilde. In a suitably over the top performances Scott Paige (most recently seen on Channel 4’s The Circle) dons a plastic Viking helmet and brandishes a tiny plastic sword, whilst giving us some of the best ‘wide eyed’ acting I’ve ever seen.

Although enjoyable and faultlessly performed, the entry from the Vatican City is less Eurovision and more Sister Act. And I was slightly disappointed with the UK’s ‘Why Don’t You Love Me Anymore?’ Again impeccably delivered in a Noel Coward style, nonetheless this felt like a wasted opportunity to explore the UK’s current relationship with mainland Europe and mine some Brexit related comedy.

But this is a minor quibble. Overall this is a lively, well produced piece of entertainment with a tight script, well-observed choreography, great sound work and some brilliantly memorable tunes, all knowingly directed by Max Bex Roberts. And, at the very end, it manages to genuinely tug at our emotions when O’Reilly delivers a song echoing the feel and sentiments of Conchita Wurst’s ‘Rise Like a Phoenix’, offering hope to those who live in parts of Europe “where love is not as free as it should be”.

The 17-strong ensemble, featuring the likes of Strictly’s Joanne Clifton, and Drag Race UK royalty Tia Kofi, enter in to the Eurovision spirit with gusto. There are some seriously good voices to be heard too, with David Ribi, as Portugal’s Mateus Villela, being my absolute favourite.

So if you fancy a great night in (before we’re all allowed to go out again), then Eurobeat comes highly recommended.  Congratulations (as Cliff Richard would say) to all.

Jack Rolfe